Tuesday, August 02, 2005
A crying baby
Now that it has been three full weeks with my new baby, Junko and I feel more confident in anticipating or interpreting many of his crys. We started out learning on the job by ourselves for the first week of his life. Next came my parents for a one week visit to help out since Terran came early and Junko's mom wasn't supposed to arrive to help for several more weeks. I don't know if Junko knows this: Anticipating that my Mom and Dad might give counter-productive assistance in caretaking of the baby, I told them not to do anything when the baby crys. Junko or I know what we are doing and will take care of him. I am sure that Junko was worried that my Mom would complain about our (her) child care or about her as a Mom. My parents quietly observed my request and (at least) I felt good about their unspoken trust of our parenting skills. I really appreciated their help in doing the laundry, getting groceries, cooking, dishwashing, and cleaning. But not in childcare. That was OUR job!
Now the roles have essentially reversed with the arrival of Junko's Mom and her sister Wako. Every morning, during my Daddy and Me time (~6:30-9am), it is my responsibility to feed Terran and look after him. Junko gets rest after her night shift. It is my greatest fear that Junko's Mom (or even Junko herself) comes out to 'help' with the crying baby. Unsolicited help makes one feel incompetent. (Mental note: this can be applied to many other areas in life.) Not only that, but many of her 'rules' have already been installed (from keeping Terran's little head straight while carrying him to sleeping with his face up instead of to the side). To add to my feeling of things quickly getting out of my (our) control, her toys and clothes are put into immediate circulation. So, now, Terran is wearing clothes that I don't think have been washed 'prior to first use' and his bed is teaming of new friends (toys) he isn't capable of playing with.... <sigh>..... I wonder if I should go work at school than work from home. Better yet, run to and from school to get my exercise too. ^o^ My preferred mode of relaxation.... <grin>
Now the roles have essentially reversed with the arrival of Junko's Mom and her sister Wako. Every morning, during my Daddy and Me time (~6:30-9am), it is my responsibility to feed Terran and look after him. Junko gets rest after her night shift. It is my greatest fear that Junko's Mom (or even Junko herself) comes out to 'help' with the crying baby. Unsolicited help makes one feel incompetent. (Mental note: this can be applied to many other areas in life.) Not only that, but many of her 'rules' have already been installed (from keeping Terran's little head straight while carrying him to sleeping with his face up instead of to the side). To add to my feeling of things quickly getting out of my (our) control, her toys and clothes are put into immediate circulation. So, now, Terran is wearing clothes that I don't think have been washed 'prior to first use' and his bed is teaming of new friends (toys) he isn't capable of playing with.... <sigh>..... I wonder if I should go work at school than work from home. Better yet, run to and from school to get my exercise too. ^o^ My preferred mode of relaxation.... <grin>
